I had to get a Snickers bar. I usually get Twix (there were none left) and feel less ashamed about it. First of all, I thoroughly dislike the taste of Snickers, whereas I truly enjoy consumption of both Twix bars, usually within 10 minutes of purchase. Second, Snickers is the epitome of instant gratification, lack of self control, embarrassing behavior (particularly because of #1- I hate Snickers).
“Hungry, why wait?” Well, because if you wait you can get
yourself a healthy snack. Perhaps an
apple or some peanuts not drenched in chemically processed caramel, nougat and
low quality chocolate. Maybe a granola
bar or cup of yogurt. Something that doesn't fall out of a brightly lit machine that stands arrogantly in the empty
cafeteria, still stinky from the lunch break.
Or at least a Twix. Getting a
Snickers is a statement, a statement I hid up my suit sleeve during the walk of
shame back from the vending machine to my office, where I immediately unwrapped
the bar and discarded the wrapper, instantly classing up my lapse in judgment. I devoured the Snickers before my office mate could return to his desk, and discarded a small piece for my homies.